Notice - Snowflakes

Hi

It is one of those wonderful Indiana days, where the snow flakes are fluttering to the ground, like miniature, crystallized butterflies. 

I know not all of you appreciate the winter weather like I do, but hang in there, and let me tell you about my entrance into my office this morning.

I was walking in, balancing my orange and grapefruit (my daughter had a fruit sale to support her band and who can beat Florida citrus in the winter?) and coffee, and I noticed...

I noticed the snowflakes fluttering by.

so...

I had to stop.

I stood there in the middle of the parking lot road with my tongue hanging out, trying to catch snowflakes on my tongue.  The wind was blowing them toward me, as I faced the west, and so I could pick out a flake and watch it come toward me.

In my usual fashion of taking the initiative and "getting things done" I looked west, chose a particularly juicy (is a snowflake juicy?) flake, and then moved to try to catch it - moving my head, mouth, tongue and body in odd gyrations to get the flake onto my tongue.

it moved

at the last minute, a tiny gust of wind blew it sideways and I did not get it.

So, driven to succeed and with a little less pleasure and a little more, "Don't mess with me!", I located another snowflake, opened my mouth, zigged left, zagged right, up a little, down a little and it was headed right toward my tongue and...it moved, just over my head...

over and over I tried - probably creating some funny imagery to anyone watching me - and over and over I failed - not a single flake.

then, in despair, I closed my mouth, gathered my things together, turned to face the door...

and was promptly hit in the lips with a snowflake - much to my joy!


the point?

sometimes I try too hard to make something happen that I am sure needs to happen just the way I have it designed in my mind - even noticing can be tainted by my psycho need to plan and control!

in my most convicted moments, I figure maybe the best way to do life is to give up on the "trying" so hard and planning and just let life come to me and see what happens.

problem is that if I apply this idea to my snowflaky (just invented a word) morning then i would have never even seen the snowflakes - I never would have been "trying" to notice the snowflakes.  I never would have stood and stuck my tongue out.  I never would have laughed at the joy of the moment.

So, if I try and control, I lose my joy because I dominate it and kill it and if I try to just relax and let is come, then I miss it.

the answer?

give the effort to notice - try some

involve God and let go of the outcome and the way it will happen - let go some

give thanks and savor the moments

you might be surprised what you will catch on your tongue!

if you identify with the struggle of day-to-day, we would love to have you join us at the next More than more - dec 22nd 645-800pm at McAllister Recreation Center, in Lafayette - hope to see you there!

thursday Dec 8th

Hey everyone!

Reminding you that More than more will be this Thursday evening, the 8th of December, from 645-800pm at McAllister Recreation Center - it is always an awesome time and i hope you all can make it!

More than more outreach November 10th - TIME CHANGE!!!

Hey everyone!

At More than more, we believe very much in acting on our different way of viewing life - and this often takes the shape of reaching out into our community.

This Thursday, instead of our usual time at McAllister, we will be meeting at our outreach.

This time we will be helping an older lady get her yard and house ready for winter (sorry to mention it for those of you who hate that word).

Her name is Mary and her address is:

8723 STOCKWELL RD
LAFAYETTE IN 47909

However, there is a major change to our "usual" outreach schedule this time as we will be having any who are able meet at her house at 430PM because of the change of the clocks this weekend and the early sunset!!

We will be planning to wrap up at about 7PM.

There will be inside and outside things to help with and kids are welcome!

We can use rakes and pruning tools and tarps.

Come prepared to work and have lots of fun serving together!!!

Looking forward to seeing you all!

Tomorrow Night

Hey everyone!
Wanted to remind you that More than more will be tomorrow night, the 27th, from 645-800pm at McAllister Recreation Center in Lafayette

Hope to see you there!

Thursday night

Hey all

we will be hanging out this thursday, Oct 13th 645-800 at McAllister Recreation Center, Lafayette for More than more

it is always a great time - a welcoming and goofy group of people - looking for a better way to live this life we are in...

As always there will be free and excellent child care for kids 5th grade and younger.

Hope to see you there

tomorrow night

hey everyone
we will be hanging out at McAllister tomorrow from 645-800pm, the 29th of sept - hope to see you there!

An Unusual Outreach

Hey everyone!

Wanted to let you know that we will be getting together this Thursday evening, the 15th of September, from 645-800pm as usual.  But, we will not be staying at McAllister the whole time.

We we will be gathering at McAllister and then around 700 will be packing up and having a "thankful night"

This is  long tradition in our family that we want to share with More than more.

We will be delivering goodies to firemen in our city, and maybe some other people.

Your job is to:

1) bring some purchased or baked cookies, cakes, etc, to share.
2) wear your orange More than more shirt if you have one (kids too) - if you don't we should have one for you.
3) consider how many people do jobs that are super important to our world (like firefighters) and yet rarely get recognized for what they do - prepare your heart to be thankful.

Looking forward to seeing you all there!

A Road Hypocrite

I have a confession to make.

I am a road hypocrite.

Please don’t judge me too harshly.

You see, earlier this summer i was hit while riding my bike to work.  Don’t freak out, it only scabbed me up a bit.  The guy was super sorry and we did not call the police or the insurance company.

But, i was mad.  Very mad…at him.  For not looking.  For not seeing me.  He didn't look.  He should've looked.  He could've killed me.  These thoughts ran through my head as i looked at my knees and my bent up front tire.

Here’s what happened - it will help you understand:

    

So, he looked to the left where the cars  were coming from, but not to the right, where i was riding the wrong way on a one way street      I figured he should have looked to his right just in case there was a pedestrian coming, or a biker!!!!

Well, over a few weeks, the anger wore off, the scabs healed, we got a new bike tire, and all was ok.  I rode my bike to work and was a bit more careful.

But then the other day, i noticed something…

I was driving close to the same area of town and i stopped at a one way street, one i knew very well.  I stopped (full and complete, for i am a safe driver).  And i looked ONLY in the direction of the oncoming cars.  I was through the intersection before i realized that if a pedestrian (or a biker going the wrong way) was going against the one way, i never would have seen them!!!  TO my horror i realized i was a road hypocrite.  I was suddenly remarkably sympathetic to the guy who hit me on my bike and remarkably thankful there was no one walking in that intersection!!

I felt the lameness of my condemnation of him.  

I felt yucky for having been so mad.

And then i realized that this is not the only area of my life like this.

There are so many areas of my life that i may judge someone else harshly and then realize in a short time that i also suck horribly at what i had judged them about.  

In fact, there are so many areas of my life i want to be more consistent, more kind, more patient, more loving, more understanding, more wise, more fun etc, etc, etc. and yet i find myself doing the very things, thinking the very things, that i don't want to.

It is so frustrating!

Sometimes i start to hammer away at myself when i realize these things and feel like i should just wear a giant “I SUCK” sign on me all the time - until i realize that everybody is like this to some degree - we all wrestle with what we wish we were - and what we have been.  The thing is, we are usually afraid to admit it.  We don't want other people to know we struggle - what will they think of us??

The problem is that owning the hypocrisy, living the truth, is part of what begins the healing process of life.  It is a piece of the puzzle that helps us progress to be less and less hypocritical over time.  As we are able to share life, we find that we are truer to the person we want to be many times, especially when we involve God in that process too!

At More than more, we are all about being true.  We are a messed up group of people with pasts that would make you blush.  We have lived lives of hypocrisy and hurt.  And yet, we have found that we can have real relationships, laugh, enjoy, and not fake it.  Hurt, and not fake it.  It’s not always easy.  

But we have found that the fake of our world, while safer sometimes than truth, is not worth it.  There is something better than life as usual.  There is something More.

If you also are tired of fake and would like to hang with some people who are looking for a new way of living - we would love for you to join us this Thursday evening, from 645-800 pm at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, in Lafayette.  As always there will be free excellent childcare for kids up to 5th grade and the center has lots to do for tweens and teens too.  You will find that it is freeing, full of laughter, some music, and some awesome people - not fancy - but we do tend to drive against the one way of our culture…

The Real Me

I often find myself writing about parenting – not because I am an expert by any means but perhaps because it’s what I am closest to.  There is no escaping being Mom.  Trust me I have tried.  Sure every now and then I get a night off and get to be me, but Mom never really leaves.  Once a mom always a mom I guess.  Don’t get me wrong it is a huge blessing to have kids – well most days.  There are “those” days that I think every mom knows about.  And honestly I have had way too many of “those” days lately. But thankfully God gives us moments or glimpses of joy to sustain “those” days.  Melt me moments like my four year old telling me I am her person. Or my fearless son reaching for me in the dark just needing to know I am still there.  Or the look my stepdaughter gives me when she is just as completely annoyed by someone as I am and reminds me I don’t have to be perfect- just real.  Which that brings me to what I really want to share.  The real me.
Truth is I am not what our society defines as perfect mother.  We all know there is this Pinterest standard of mothering that includes all sorts of qualifications – making perfect balanced and pretty lunches, healthy snacks with no processed ingredients, birthday party decorations more elaborate than my wedding, handmade crafts with glitter, homemade laundry detergent, 30 freezer meals in an hour, Blah blah blah.  Ya know what- I hate glitter, lunchables are my best friend, and 30 freezer meals in less than an hour would be a bunch of kid cuisines or pizza rolls. But you know what I am saying.  We are held to expectations and standards that don’t fit in our reality. As absurd as it sounds I still try to fit my way in this standard.  Truth is my kids don’t care if I make our laundry detergent or if their birthday party is elaborate and pin worthy.  They want Mom to color in a coloring book or play tic tac toe.  They want my time and my focus.  They want hugs more than cookie cutter shaped sandwiches.  They want Mom to talk to them not at them.  They want Mom to be patient not perfect.  Sounds simple and easy.  Oh but it’s not.  When ya have a screaming 4 year old mad because she wants to watch Peppa Pig at the same time your son is desperately trying to intensely educate you on Pokemon and 8 year old pouting because you told her she cannot eat an entire jar of pickles as a snack - BELIEVE me it’s hard to keep calm and not scream.  Or maybe you have an ADHD child like I do and is having a major meltdown over something incredibly specific he needs and cannot stop until he has it.  And although it is completely unrealistic request you truly wish you had the mystical item and could just give it to him to stop the insanity but you know that’s not the answer.  Here is where the real me comes out.  Its not what you might guess. Its not the me I used to be.  Its not the me that argues back with him about how ridiculous he sounds.  Its not the me that grasps for control.  Its not the me that tried to make him behave the way a kid should behave.  Its not the me that said I expect you to do as you’re told.  And not the me that literally had to force him into his room to take a time out.  Its not even the me that after it was all said and done cried for hours about how I would never be able to be what this kid needs.  Not the broken mess that wanted to fix my broken son.  The real me came into the picture just recently.  The real me is not me alone.  It’s me and all my broken inability reaching out and giving control to God.  The real me is when He is with me.  Its when I can step back and say whoa what the heck just happened when a meltdown ends calmly and an apology is spoken.  It’s the mom that God makes me when I call out for His help.  It’s the mom that listens and speaks to Drew rather than at him.  It’s the Mom that repeats what he says 20 times if needed until he realizes I am listening.  It’s the mom that takes the 30 extra minutes to remind him He can trust me.  It’s when the meltdown is over and some tells me how impressed they are with my patience.  MY patience….!!! I am not naturally a patient person.  That’s when I saw the change.  That’s when I fell to my knees in praise because I knew God was working in me.  The real me is accepting that God called me to be Steppy (stepmom) to my stepdaughter not Mom.  The real me knows that even though I love her as my own – she has an amazing mom that loves her in a unique incomparable way.  And the real me knows there is nothing wrong with that.  The real me fights for what is right for Ella not what I want.  The real me isn’t always visible.  Sometimes the old me gets in the way and gets upset.  She is impatient and easily flustered.  Just recently the old me questioned why I was even a mom.  I felt so inadequate and wanted to run away from being a mom.  But thankfully God reminded me who He has called me to be is not who I think I should be.  The real me hides some days and shines others.  It’s all part of the journey and sometimes “those” days get in the way.  But I will push on and keep finding pieces of the real me.  Its funny I have such a hard time finding the real me but my kids already know her.  After all the real me is my daughter’s person. 

Thanks so much Megan.  Your honesty is inspiring!

If you, like Meg, feel the pressure of the world and just want to hang out with some other real people - we would love to hang with you this Thursday evening, August 18th, from 645-8pm, at McAllister Recreation Center - just off 20th and Schuyler in Lafayette

Be the Light

this morning I found myself focused on a beautiful strand of simple white lights. I noticed a couple bulbs no longer were glowing and some missing bulbs.  Made me think of those annoying strands of Christmas lights that when 1 bulb went out the whole strand went dark.  Then you were stuck checking each light to find the broken bulb and searching for a new bulb to replace broken one. Time consuming hassle, right?  Yet this strand of lights was different.  The majority of the strand remained lit. Hmmm. I chose to believe God was trying to highlight something for me.
God is light. He loves us in our dark brokenness.  Without Him we are lost.  He teaches us to be a light in this dark world - to the show his goodness and love.  He calls us to unite with other believers to accomplish this journey - whether it be a church, family, friends, or group of broken strangers.  We are not expected to do this alone.
I don't believe you have to know God to be a light. There are tons of encouraging awesome people that makes this world a better place.  I believe individually we can shine pretty bright. However, we burn out.   We come upon challenges that break us, we wear out, we hurt, we get angry and explode, we face impossible situations - we lose our glow.  Then what?  We darken the whole stand.  We spread negativity. Others search for a new source of light. A new bulb to fix the strand.  A new person or thing to follow.
The light God shines and teaches us to share is not the same light.  His light strengthens. His light heals. His light is love.  And when a group of His lights come together they brighten the world.  No bulb is perfect.  Each bulb has unique glow that God specifically designed.  We still burn out. Sometimes we run away. The difference is we are surrounded and united with other bulbs that share the same source.  We relight each other with prayer and love.  We hold each other up.  We remind each other the truth. 
It's about the group or the church nor the denomination.  It's not about the pastor or leader. It's not about our abilities.  I will be first to admit I am far from capable on my own.  I have been a burnt bulb for awhile - even wanted to run away. But I have been blessed with amazing other bulbs that keep pushing me in right direction. Blessed with prayers over a slip of paper. Blessed with hugs.  Blessed with listening ears.  Blessed with laughter over introductory questions. Blessed to be part of a strand whose source is greater than the world can dream of.

Maybe you find yourself in dark place needing some light. Or maybe you are bright light looking for a strand to plug into. 
Join us as we gather together to be the light.  

We will next be hanging out from 645-800 pm on the 4th of August at McAllister Recreation Center in Lafayette - there is free childcare as always

Meg

tomorrow reminder

reminding you all that tomorrow night, July 21st, we will be at McAllister - just off 20th and Schuyler - Lafayette - from 645-800pm
there will, as always, be awesome care for kids thru age 5th grade and the recreation center has lots of fun things to do for older kids too!
it is always a great time and we hope to see you there!

Tomorrow Night

reminder that tomorrow night, 7/7 - 645-8 is Mtm at McAllister Center - hope to see you there!

Thursday Night

Hey you'all
We will be hanging out at McAllister this Thursday night, June 23rd - 645-800pm - as usual.
If you are not familiar with McAllister Recreation Center, it is just off 20th and Schuyler Ave - in Lafayette.
And if you have never been to Morethanmore, you will find that it is an awesome time of laughter and goofiness, with a mix-in of trying to figure out some better ways to look at life than typical American.
We will, as always, have excellent and free child care for kids up to 5th grade.
We hope to see you there!

outreach next thursday

Hey everyone

Just a reminder that next Thursday, the 26th, Mtm will be reaching out into our community and helping some folks in need.  

 

We will meet at 630 at Ty and Marcie's house, 1216 w 400 s, Lafayette, see attached picture, and wear clothes for painting and working in yard.  All ages welcome.

Hope to see u all there!!

 

Next time together is tomorrow

just wanted to remind you that we love hanging out at Morethanmore and we will be this thursday, april 28th from 645-800 at McAllister recreation center in Lafayette

hope to see you there

keeping noticing...

Tomorrow night

Hey you all wanted to remind you that More than more will be this Thursday, the 14th, 645-800 pm - McAllister as usual.

It truly is a blast and we hope you can make it!

brown...and white

This season is amazing.

I love the changes of spring - and growth, the budding, the flowers (not so much the allergies...)

The other day my family was driving in the country, bumping along undoubtedly somewhat faster than many (because my wife was driving) in our domestic minivan.  Having conversation about their day and life - annoying each other and catching up - encouraging each other and pestering each other - like families do.

They came upon a clearing, looking across the open fields, they saw a tree line so typical of spring.

Brown - stick trees with their leaves long gone from last years fall, some with leaves clinging to their branches as if they might not make it if the last of the leaves fall.  A tree line of brown - like a dreary lighthouse signaling the dormancy and sleepiness and even the death and decay of winter.

And there in the middle of the brown - surrounded - a blossoming Bradford Pear tree.  Awash in its glaringly white blooms - a contrast of life and newness and brightness - as if to scream, "Goodness is here!  Decay is only part of the story - death is only a piece of this world!!"

Looking at that tree line - you might become convinced that death and decay and brown is winning - but we all know that if we revisit the tree line in another week or two or three, that those brown trees will all have new buds and baby leaves - stretching out from their limbs and that life will have spread from the white of the pear tree up and down the line - and in a month or so beautiful green leaves will be there - oozing the wonder of oxygen for us!


You know, I look around me in this world - and I see a lot of brown.  It's hard not to.

In real people
                 I see
                     cancer
                          and heart failure. 
             I see grieving
                          and pain and hurt. 
         I see divorce
              and abandonment

In my culture I see decay in politics

And brown death in terrorism - bombs and suicides


And I have to admit sometimes I feel as if the brown is winning...

I look at the tree line of my world and my heart aches for anything alive.


Then when I look differently.  When I notice.  When I see the small, true, good, pear trees.  I realize that it is not the brown that is winning - and it is not the brown that is even the important part to notice. 

I see the white blossoms of people caring.

I see the white blossoms of the love in people's hearts.

I see the pear trees of faithful moms and dads and families.

I see the life of the warm sun and the painted sunrises.

I see the bursting life of people's lives changing for the better - letting go of addictions and hurts and losses and pains and habits and selfishness and bitterness - in favor of tenderness and freedom and love and peace and hope for...

spring to come.


This is More than more.

The world is brown - you would have to be an idiot to not see it. 

But we at More than more...

we see the blossoms -
                we notice -
                     we choose to -
                          we learn to -
                              we encourage each other to and
                                           we work hard to infect those spring blossoms
                                            wherever we find the decaying brown of this world


So,

If you take a look at the tree line of this world today and you see the brown death of winter - don't be fooled to believe that it is winning.  There is life.  I encourage you to look for it.  See it. 
                                                                                        In the simple - in the good. 
But even more,

Be it. 
Be the good. 

Blossom in your life.  Focus your life on the things that matter.  Be thankful to the amazing God who made the goodness not in the policies and economies, but in the heartbeat in your chest.

And if you would like to hang out with some people who are on that path - who are done with the usual get more, buy more, become more philosophies of this world that only bring death and decay,
we would love to have you join us - we hang out every other Thursday night at McAllister Recreation Center - Just off 20th and Schuyler Ave - Lafayette - from 645-800pm.  The next time we will be together will be April 14th.  Hope you can make it.

More than more tonight!! And outreach in 2wks!! Save the 31st date!!

reminding you that tonight is More than more at McAllister Recreation Center, Lafayette, from 645-800 - as always there will be free childcare and it will be a fantastic time!!

Also, please remember to save the date for the next Mtm, the 31st of March, 630pm - we will not be at McAllister  - we will be meeting at Murdock Elementary for Taco night dinner and helping some of the folks there to have shoes for their families - if you want to help with food, please text Melissa, or comment on this post

hoping to see you there!

Tomorrow night

We will be hanging out tomorrow night, the 3rd of March, from 645-800pm at McAllister Recreation Center for More than more.  Wanted to remind everyone!  Hope to see you there!

tomorrow night

Hey y'all

wanted to remind you that More than more will be hanging out tomorrow night 645-800pm at McAllister Recreation Center in Lafayette - hope to see you there!!

Jason

Tomorrow night

just wanted to remind all of you that tomorrow night, the 4th of February, is our next time to hang out at Morethanmore - we will be at McAllister recreation center in Lafayette from 645-8 - hope to see you there!!

focus

focus

so many times I find myself focused on what I do not want to be focused on

I find myself thinking about what I don't have...
                                 what I think I need..
                             what will help me survive...
                           what the problems are...
                       what the issues are...
                    what would make me happy...
                what I need to protect myself...
             how I have failed...
          how miserable I am or someone is...

Most of the time when I get into thinking like this I find myself feeling, thinking, and acting in ways that I do not want to...

typically, I realize it after doing, saying, thinking something that I regret...

the regret motivates me to not behave that way, think that way, anymore...

but before long I seem to be thinking or feeling or doing it again...


I do not seem to be able to change my focus very well on my own...

the change in focus needs to come from inside me - from a change in the way I view the world and myself and those in it

this is what we do at More than more - we explore ways to see the world differently - to begin to change inside - it is a great time - tons of fun - and I hope that you can join us next Thursday night, the 21st of January from 645-800 pm at McAllister Recreation Center - just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, Lafayette

Thursday

Hello everyone!

Hope your holidays have been full of peace and joy!

We have had quite a time away from Mtm because of the way all the holidays fell this year!

But, we will be back together again this Thursday, the 7th of January from 645-800pm just off 20th and Schuyler in Lafayette, at McAllister recreation center.

It will be good to hang out, laugh and chill together and stretch our minds some past the "always more" of this crazy American life!

Hope to see you there