Roses From Ashes

What do we do when tragedy strikes, when our hearts break, when pain drives us to a state of numbness, when our fists are clenched with anger, when addictions takes over, when we feel isolated and alone, when we feel like giving up, when we find ourselves at the end of our rope and all we can do is survive the moment….????

I have been there.  Many times.  We have all experienced pain at some point in our lives- and each of us has handled it in different ways.  Some good.  Some bad.  In the past (still occasionally) I would lock the hurt up inside my heart so tight and run and hide.  I would try to protect myself through isolation.  I would keep friends and family at a distance and if I felt they were getting too close I would push them away.  I did not want to depend on anyone or most of all be hurt by anyone ever again.  Let me give you an example- which is not easy for me- it takes a lot for me to really open up to anyone.  But what I have learned is that as hard as it is for me to share- God calls us to.  I remember when others shared- I saw how God worked in their life.  I felt the realness and closeness of God.   I felt love that I never knew existed.  

I have been through a few extremely painful events in my life- death and divorce.  First I lost my Dad.  I felt like the only person in the world who understood me was ripped away right before my eyes.  Yet I held it together for quite awhile.  I had to be strong for my Mom and sisters.  I kept pushing the anger and hurt deep inside until I found myself so depressed I couldn’t function.  All I wanted to do was lock myself in my room and sleep.  Well somehow my doc saw through my “I’m fine” statement and broke open my vault.  Just a crack- but enough for the hurt to start pouring out and the healing to begin.  Then a year later I found myself smack dab in the middle of a separation that was headed towards a divorce.   Even after tons of forgiveness and attempts to save my broken marriage my husband chose the drugs and new girlfriend and left me and our son.  Hello pain- my name is Megan- are you ever going away?  It was just too much.  I was a MESS!!!  Doc cracked the vault a little more-  by continuing to pour examples of God’s greatness on me even though I rejected his invites to More than More.  I took baby steps through the grief as I still tried to block myself from any potential hurt.  I think God kind of gave me a shove once.  Long story short- just hours after I finally filled out my divorce papers- Matt found me.  With a simple glance back our lives changed.  He swept me off my feet and we fell in love.  I know sappy.  But it happened.  Matt asked- I said yes.  We set a date.  I got the flu- or so I thought.  Surprise- prego!  Our church frowned, people judged, hurt, hurt, and more hurt.  I wanted to run, did for awhile, but then I took a leap.  I went to More than More.  My wall was up- hope was low.  Yet, no one judged us or rejected us.  We kept going- not always easy and sometimes took lots of encouragement and reminders of my need to be there.  Then there was a turning point for me- these super sweet gals threw me a baby shower.  I thought really "Who does this??""  I mean who takes this divorced, engaged, knocked up chaotic mess and just loves her??  More than More did.  Huh.  Life changing.  Baby steps turned into learning to walk, then almost skips at times with joy, I ran- but not away from God- towards the group- towards God.  See God became real to me through these amazingly equally screwed up people.  I still have pain- who doesn't?  But I have hope now.  

Maybe you can relate.  Maybe you are numb.  Maybe so many people have burned you that you are just sick of giving out more chances.  Maybe you don't know where to go from here.  I don't have the answers. What I know is my past- I beat myself up with lies, I hid, I cried, I yelled, I ran away, I was consumed with emotions- anger, sadness, rage, numbness, shock, hurt, fear, but most of all I stockpiled everything in my vault.  And it did NOT help.  It was not until I took a risk and trusted one person that I found His way.  

He sent me to preach good news to the poor, heal the heartbroken, Announce freedom to all captives, pardon all prisoners.  God sent me to announce the year of grace- a celebration of God's destruction of our enemies- and to comfort all who mourn, to care for the needs of all who mourn in Zion, give them bouquets of roses instead of ashes, messages of joy instead of news of doom, a praising heart instead of a languid spirit.  Rename them "Oaks of Righteousness"  planted by God to display his glory.  They'll rebuild the old ruins, raise a new city out of the wreckage.  

If you are looking for this kind of different - a life that means more than just the average every day Americanism, we would love to have join us and hang out this Thursday, the 26th of July, 6:45-8:00PM at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, Lafayette.

As always there will be fantastic activities for all kids too!

The Growing Song

The other day i was pulling some weeds in my friend's yard - he is busy and does not have the time to and it was a great chance to invest in something relatively mindless, spacing out, trying to not think too much about all the stuff going on in my life.

It has been a heavy time for us, much too much to think about and i was seizing the chance to not be completely overwhelmed for a little bit.  Enjoying the heat of the day and the sweat on my skin - i know it's weird, but when you work in an air conditioned office all day, it always makes me feel somehow more alive to sweat and work hard with my hands.

As i pulled weed after prickly weed, feeling some release of the burdens in my heart, i heard some sounds coming from the house behind my friend's house in the subdivision.  Back and forth went the voices of a man and woman.  In heated tones they each tried with passion to express why they were right and the other was wrong.  They were arguing - back and forth in my head, it began to feel a little like being a ping pong tournament observer - and there was no sign that either was going to back down.  Their voices were loud and grating.

But, what was that?  There was a softer, melody sound that seemed to be struggling to be heard under the thrash of the ping ponging argument.  Tuning to the softer sing/song sound, it became clear what it was.  The man and woman who were fighting had a little girl - maybe 4 years old - and she was singing.  There in the middle of the argument, soft, but beautiful, was her song.  I could not make out the words to her song, but it was sung with the innocence of a 4 year old girl's voice - absolutely lovely.

Over the next 10 minutes or so, the fight raged back and forth, back and forth, but the song seemed to grow.  It might be that i was just selectively hearing the song, and blocking out the argument, but i don't think so.  I think the little girl was realizing that her song sounded much better to her than the heated argument and so she increased the volume little by little until her song rose above the fray of the argument.  I could still hear the argument and when the song paused for a breath, the contenders trying to prove their point were still there.  But the song began to resonate in my heart and there in my friend's flower beds, my heart softened and i wanted to sing with the girl, or maybe just take a seat and listen to her sing.

Here's the point:
                 Our world, my world, feels like an argument.  I feel/we feel so many times as if our very existence is an affront to someone, maybe even ourselves.  We rage at life and life rages at us.  Our habits push us to do things we don't want to do.  Our families and relationships are way too often battlegrounds where we feel as if it is a kill or be killed feeling.  Our jobs are frantic and we are expected to do more with less.  Our bills are bigger than we make.  Our hearts and minds want something better than the world we live in, but we cannot see what it might be - each time we think we've found it, it seems to slip from us.  Then there's More than more, where we find Truth and good friends, who become family-as-family-should-be, love and peace and joy - an island in the storms of life.  The thing is, we are anything but exempt from the pain and the argument of life - life continues to throw crap at us - like illness in those we love, like choices we make that we don't want to but can't seem to keep from, like job losses that come from thin air, like relational woes that seem like they should go away easier than they are but that continue to come.  It seems as if we are in the middle of an argument sometimes - voices raised, we scream at life and circumstances, and habits and our agony - wanting to give up but wanting to fight, we hear the words of the switchfoot song:

 Yah! It's where the fight begins
Yah! Underneath the skin
Beneath these hopes and where we've been
Every fight comes from the fight within

I am the war inside
I am the battle line
I am the rising tide
I am the more I fight

Yet, in More than more there is another voice.  From within and from those who dare to love us after knowing everything.  From those we have dared to trust.  From the God who would dare to love us, the most broken, the most pitiful, the most unfaithful.  We heard the voice the first time we met someone from More than more.  It sounded far off and honestly, too good to be true.  But the more we know, the more we invest, the more we Trust, the louder the voice becomes.  It sings with a melody that is pure and true and resonates to the depths of our souls.  Once you have listened to it for a while, there is no doubt it is true and that you want to hear more of it, all of it, for the rest of your life - there is peace in the song, there is meaning in the song, there is beauty in the song, there is life, real life, in the song.  There is More in the song.

I wish in these days that the argument would stop.  My heart aches for argument-free moments, much less days.  Unfortunately, i am still a very screwed up guy though and there is much in me to be healed, way too much still broken.  Those parts continue the argument - they wage the "war inside"


       But the song

             Once embedded in my mind, once ringing in my heart

                  Never will be quenched, never drowned out again
                     - it is the song of freedom.

                          Won't you come and listen to it with me?
                            Let us sing it to you.  Sing with us.

Not literally - i can't sing worth a hoot - but join in the song that can never be destroyed by the argument


                That's what we are all about at
                 More than more

We hope you can join us this Thursday July 12th 6:45-8:00PM, at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, Lafayette.  As always, there will be wonderful activities for children of all ages.

Change - inevitable..good?

Last Thursday we talked about change. Change. Does that word make you cringe?? Shudder?? Spark excitement?? Intrigue you?? Change can create all kinds of emotions good or bad- sometimes so fast you feel like in a tornado of swirling thoughts and feelings. What we often forget is what a blessing the ability to change is. We chatted about what causes change, how change happens, what makes change possible, what does change bring and so much more. What I took from it- that change is possible even when we don't think there is anyway- with God there is always a way.




Read this song Chris August wrote-



Maybe it's a mind thing,

Maybe I'm a lost cause,

Either way I'm tired,

Gotta gather up a life lost.



I tell myself I'm okay,

To keep myself from crying,

How am I to make a change,

If I'm never trying?



[x2:]

If my world will never be the same,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.

Make a start in forever in the pain,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.



Swimmin in an ocean,

Trying just to find out,

Hatin what I'm knownin,

And knowin what I'm all about.

If I could change this,

If only this could change me,

Then I will be new man,

Back to when I believed.



[x2:]

If my world will never be the same,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.

Make a start in forever in the pain,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.



I walked away

But I'm crawling back,

Said I'm coming full circle.

It took some time,

So many years,

But I'm coming full circle.

I wanna be free,

But talk is cheap,

Said I'm coming full circle.

The blame is me

And now I see

That I ran,

I pushed away

But you stuck right by my side,

I'm changing.



[x3:]

If my world will never be the same,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.

Make a start in forever in the pain,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.



Turn this life around



If my world will never be the same,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.

Make a start in forever in the pain,

Maybe one of these days I'll change.







Now if you are a Chris August fan like me- you are thinking- wait I have never heard this- is this a new song??? Nope. This song was release in 2007. Before he was awarded the GMA Dove Awards for New Artist of the Year & Male Vocalist of the Year for 2011. Hmmm.... wait song was released in 2007- won NEW artist award in 2011. His hugely popular song "Starry Night" was released in 2010.... Timeline not adding up. Well here is why. Chris was in the music business for several years before he rededicated his music and life back to God. So what I noticed is Chris sang this song in 2007 about turning his life around and wanting to someday change. "I pushed away but you stuck right by my side." "If I could change this, if only this could change me, then I will be new man, back to when I believed." Okay quick timeline. So here is a guy who was a Christian- walked away, wanted to change- but clearly not easy, YET- rededicated his life to God and with God it was possible...HE CHANGED! He went from a average mainstream artist to NEW artist of the year and male vocalist of the year. See with God ALL things are possible.



Maybe that still seems impossible to you- trust me- IM WITH YOU! I don't hate change, I just doubt it. Maybe you are saying the same thing I would- "Ok but Chris August is famous- life is different- he's not just an average person like me." Well in a sense that is true- although he is about the most average musician you could find- actually at the last concert I saw him in at he was outside walking the line of ticket buyers- just chatting it up- even went in and got his guitar and played a few songs to entertain us. Stood right by me just like a normal guy. Anyway back to my point. Here is the amazing thing. God created each of us with the ability to change. Not just Chris. But you and me too. It's funny because as I sit here writing this I have been struggling all week with a change I feel God is directing me to. I have wrestled it around in my mind so much I feel like screaming about it- I honestly just want to yell at God- "Are you nuts???? There is no way that is possible!!!" My own words just smacked me in the face- dummy read what you are writing.



So maybe you are up against a big change in your life like I am, maybe yours is a change in relationship, behavior, addiction, job, housing, or anything- IT CAN HAPPEN! Here is my plan...and I can think of nothing better than to do it with a friend....



Romans 12



Place Your Life Before God



1-2 So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.



We will be meeting again Thursday June 28th at 6:45-8:00PM, at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, Lafayette. Love to see you there!





Megan

Coaching & Teams, More than more style!

So I'm not a sports smarty and honestly not really even a fan of well...any sport.  Yet I love the concept of a team led by a coach.  And here is what I noticed.  A good team is not created by the coach- but led by the coach.  A good team is not based on the number of wins, but by the attitude of the team.  A good team includes a wide variety of individuals with various skills.  A good coach not only teaches his team physically but emotionally.  A good team is not dependent upon their coach but supported by their coach.  A great team will not collapse in the absence of their leader.  Here is how I know.  Our More than More leader was unable to attend our last meeting due to an unexpected situation.  WOW was he missed, yet the group pulled together and made it happen.  Turns out we are a pretty good team with a darn great coach.  And in my opinion we shared a beautiful example of what More than More is to several newcomers.  A couple of times I heard some of the regulars encourage the newcomers that they would have to return for the full experience because it just was not the same without our leader.  Yet as different as it was from a normal (not sure I can use that word to describe us) Thursday at McAllister it was still us.  We shared the value of relationships that had been built through this group, shared the amazing wonder of how a bunch of strangers became a family, shared individual experiences, shared laughter- lots of laughter, shared some broken pieces of our lives, shared prayers and stories, shared our time just chatting and enjoying each other company.  Made me ask myself " What is More than More?"  And more importantly how do you fully yet simply describe something so amazing.  As I delayed writing this because I could not put it into words- something amazing happened.  Two people defined it for me.

 

First my pastor:  He told us to imagine a community of people know by these things-love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness.  People who love, know peace, generous- just give freely...it would be like heaven.  What if we were known by how quick we are to extend compassion.  It would be a lifestyle people would naturally gravitate to.  It's odd-it's different than this life.  It's produced by extraordinary God- not us.  He asked... "What would this look like?"

I just grinned- MORE THAN MORE!!!

 

Second- one of our own wrote this:  The reason we reach out and love one another the way we do, is we are trying to "simply embrace what the Spirit is doing in us."  When we do that, we won't treat people as remote and unimportant.  We will text, we will we call, we will cook, we will clean, we will baby-sit, we will dive into each other's lives, pain and all.  We don't want to be a Band-Aid to each other, we want to truly help each other heal, live in each other's pains and joys, just as Jesus did with his own disciples.

 

So what is More than More???  Well there is no exact definition.  To understand you really have to experience it.  Simply- to me- it is love.  Want to see for yourself??????  PLEASE join us Thursday 6-14-12 at 6:45 pm at McAllister Center- 2351 N 20th St.  Fantastic childcare provided for all ages!

Hope you can Join us Thursday Night!

Hey everyone!  We will be hanging out this Thursday night, 6/14, 6:45-8:00PM at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler ave, Lafayette.

It is always a great time to laugh and enjoy some time with some people who accept you for who you are and to begin to see some new ways of looking at life!!

hope to see you there!

Is Truth True?

So last night we talked about truth. To me it is such a simple word. The meaning seems pretty obvious. Yet somehow to most people it is extremely difficult to practice. We believe we are being honest because we are not telling lies. But when you really stop and think about it- Are you being true to who you are?? Are you compromising who you are to be who society wants you to be? Do you let others change who you are to fit in? Do you practice what you preach? Well I thought I did. My kids will tell you mommy hates lies. And I do-I just cannot stand lies. I cringe at fakeness- makes me angry. I’m a tell like is it kind of girl. I don’t see the point in sugar coating things. But what I learned last night is I might not lie to others- but I have been lying to myself for years. I tell myself I value time with my kiddos. But when I am with them I am constantly telling them no mommy does not have time to play, mommy has to do the laundry- mommy has to wash the bottles, mommy has to clean the house…. I have been so consumed with keeping up with things around the house and my kids are suffering the loss. It’s time I stop worrying if my house looks like a toy factory exploded and start playing with the escaped superheroes I find under my feet and dolls with tangled hair that need mommy’s help. I need to put the To Do list away and sit down and play candy land in the mess. Need to remember what my mom always says- people will know this house is lived in, not a display.








What I noticed is every single one of us struggles with truth in some way or another. Yet I know truth does exist. It is real! How do I know you might ask? Well we have a magnificent God that shows us the realness of truth. He says what he means and means what he says. I also see it in More than More. I see it in the actions of this amazing group of people. People who not only say they care- BUT ACTUALLY DO! I know it’s hard to believe a group of strangers from all different walks of life can become like a family. I didn’t believe it when I first joined More than More. Thought the idea of More sounded pretty exciting but was extremely doubtful. But then I sat down in a circle of strangers and immediately a super sweet gal sat down beside me and my fiancé and made us feel welcome- important- included- LOVED. Now about a year later this super sweet and super funny gal was mistaken to be my husband’s mom. You see this group is super cool. I mean it. Don’t let anything stop you from coming! You will be welcome as you are for who you are- and that is the TRUTH!







So if you are sick of the American society where lies are everywhere, politicians with beliefs not backed by actions, lies to our children, and dishonesty to get more money more stuff more success, and interested in a different way of living- a way where truth exists and people really matter…..Then come hang out with us on Thursday May 31st, from 6:45-8:00PM, at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, Lafayette. As always AMAZING childcare provided (really my kids beg to go back!)

Whar's the big deal about a birthday?

Last More than more we had a fantastic time on an outreach.  What is an outreach?  I'm glad you asked.  At More than more, we believe that life is about More than just the everyday stuff it seems like it is about.  There is much More.  We enjoy learning about this and looking for new ways to change our perspectives on this life every other Thursday night at McAllister Recreation Center, just off 20th and Schuyler Ave, Lafayette, from 6:45-8:00.  In fact we will be there this Thursday night, May 3rd.  As always. there will be cool activities for all age kids.  
But, our usual Thursdays are only a small part of our lives.  We want this idea, this life, to be the way we live all the time, in our homes, in our workplaces, in our schools - we want to be different, wonderfully, joyfully different!
Part of what makes us different is that we just are not content to sit and enjoy our perspective and joy, we are determined to share it with as many people as possible - we are thrilled to be living life better, but we are sad at the fact that there are so many people in the world right around us who do not realize the wonder of life!!

All that to say, our outreach projects are designed to show other people the kind of perspective we are trying to live with every day and that we learn about every other Thursday night. 

So, back to the title of this post - what's the big deal?

Well, did you realize that on the day of your birth, you were a gift to the world?  The God who made you could have chosen any combination of your parents' genetic material and out of all the possibilities, He chose you!!!  You are a gift, to us, to your world!

So many times in our culture we attribute value to people by their financial statement, by the health, by their popularity, by their location, by their race, etc.  Once a person told me they truly believed that a person's actual value only existed if they made certain amounts of money and was "productive."  But that person was wrong (and they made me kinda sick i have to tell you).  You see, all of us have a birthday - all of us are a treasure to the One who created us, amazingly and intricately made, each part of us a masterpiece!  And so many times we miss it - our value comes in our birth - that is a lot to celebrate!

So, at More than more, we love birthdays - not just because we love an excuse to party (even though we do!) - but because we love to celebrate God's creativity and birthdays become an outreach when they become a way for us to share the joy in our lives with someone else and remind them of their value, to us, and to God, by celebrating their birthday!  

This last Thursday we celebrated the birthday of one of our friends, her name is Carla.  We all went over, had a fantastic lavender frosted spice cake (that's her favorite kind!) and the kids painted bird houses - she loves birds.  We gave her gifts, she blew out candles and a good time was had by all!!  

But the best by far was the peaceful joyful face Carla had as the realization sunk deeply into her heart that she mattered, that she was wonderful, that the real gift on her birthday was her, from God to us!  I hope she never forgets, and i hope you don't either.

If this kind of crazy fun sounds like it might be worth a try, please join us Thursday - we do have tons of fun!
Hope to see you there!